Shortimerz Syndrome

My time here in the Aloha State is on the decline. It's almost May which to me is synonymous with Mainland. I'm looking forward to another summer of crazy parties, music festivals and bicycles. Fingers crossed.

The other day I got to venture to the Big Island... but that was literally the other DAY. Yup, we (myself and a couple workmates) were there for a little less than 48 hours. It sucked everything out of my meager bank account BUT we got to buy papayas at 4 for $1, stay in the hippie enclave of Pahoa where Ning's cooked up the best Thai food I've ever had the pleasure of savoring, met all sorts of Big Island crazies AND swam in a warm spring (a tidal pool/hot spring). The Big Island is the best thing to happen to Hawaii in about 300,000 years.

And like that I'm back on Oahu inhaling red dirt and overspending on Newman O's and trinkets. And every time I watch that sun set I get to itching for the day I hop on the plane and retire from island life. That's not to say that the Big Island is not in my future. There was at least one bar in Hilo with an actual sign of life there. Go figure. Go 'head fool, compute!!

Phantom II (Soulwax Remix 2) by Justice is PUMPING in my earbuds. I'm seeing triple at Bonnaroo as I write this. Thomas Mars just crowd surfed by me again. He's got a tiny pimple on his chin. And barely any facial hair. It's over. I'm driving up north for Osheaga! Crap, it's over. That's okay, I've got Rifflandia 3!! Summer, you must really miss me.

Random randomnositude: My most recent school group at camp, an all-girl 5th grade class that included Dwayne "Dog the Bounty Hunter" Chapman's daughter, had students named Sunshine and Liberty. Is the pakalolo making a come back?

And I sunburned the right side of my belly a couple days ago. Just the right side of just my belly.

Living in Alaska is like:

Living in Alaska during the end of summer is like:

-Smelling, perpetually, like a camp fire. And after bathing, you smell like camp fire/soap.

-Crowd surfing when the crowd you're surfing is gravel. This stuff is everywhere. One ended up embedded in my car's windshield the other day. Needless to say, Novus and Speedy Glass do well out here.

-Living 4 hours behind the rest of the world. Because we know the whole world is in the Eastern Time Zone.

-Keeping constant vigil for animal droppings. Why? Although stepping in it would be stinky and nasty, running into who left them would just be nasty.

-An orgy of duct tape. Because duct tape is everywhere and if, heaven forbid, you run out of the stuff the Walmart in Wasilla sells more of it than any single store anywhere else in the world.

-Struggling to have just a little heat, warmth, coziness. There's a dearth of sunshine here during the rainy season so emotions run high in a sad way. Rainy and damp. And chilly. It's an epic setting for a Hitchcock, Wes Craven collaboration. Worst of all, I've found love is in short supply. There's no cat and mouse to play, no flirting, no gesturing. People here are clad in flannel, are hearty and are forward. In short, the people are as cold as the name Alaskan implies.

-Everything you expected it would be. Today someone down at Keith's Service Station called me looking for a moose tag. She gave me only 4 digits for her phone number. People routinely refer to 30 miles down the road as "just" down the road. Addresses aren't addresses as much as they are mile posts. I sleep at milepost 231 and I work in and around milepost 238.6. You hitchhike, wear Merino wool socks, fish, hunt, drink, and have fingers built like beaver tails.

Alcohol and life

View from the roof of loft party, Bushwick, Brooklyn

That's the entrance to the loft across the street I ended up crashing after the police thinned out the first party. Turns out, the second one was corny and the small entourage of lesbians I found myself with were scavenging alcohol in the kitchen. Yucksters.

But what made the night really chill was the dude I'm supposed to be moving to Peru with. He's certainly going in November, but said I could join him afterwards and doesn't mind if I don't come down right away. Then he started busting dance moves on the dance floor. Riotous! We're going to give Peru hell.

Just reliving my one glorious night of like the whole summer. Then it gets cold as fuck. The type of cold where if you stub your toe, you fear the doctors might want to amputate.

And here's what sucks during the fall and winter months: waking up early on a Sunday. Why? Well, the only thing of interest to do all day long is watch the NFL! I wake up at 7am and am stuck for hours finding shit to do (which usually entails cleaning). I guess it's a blessing to have the time and motivation to tidy, but I'd much prefer to wake up at 12:30pm, 30 minutes before the kick-off of the 1pm games. Know what I means?

Oooooh, and I goooooooofed! I won't say how, but I goofed something TERRIBLE. Or should I say terr-i-ble! That's how my tutee says her Monday class schedule is. One emphasized syllable for every 3 hour class. It's all about timing.

"Master say being born colored was the worst disease/
and we the worst of breeds, worst than fleas/
'cause as long as I work for he, I work for free/
he beat me like a dick in jail and curse at me"
Sean J of the Field Mob on Nothing 2 lose

Today I'm feeling:

sympathetic

As in my sympathetic system is firing away!

Max't

Just realized that I have 1017 songs on my iPod Mini. It's time for me to get a new one with way more memory. I've maxed out my iPod. Can you believe that?

Good thing I deleted all those Mike Jones songs.

"Mike Jones, who?/
Mike Jones!"
Mike Jones on everything he's ever recorded

Today I'm feeling:

full

Hollar at your Uncle Ho

What Koreans eat for din din

I'm a racist, and consider this my racist statement! And with that said, check out this racist.

"Nothing is more precious than independence and freedom."
Guess who? Abraham Lincoln? Mahatma Gandhi? Martin Luther King Jr.? Mother fucking Benjamin Franklin or one of the other founding fathers? Winston Churchill maybe? Pppfffftttt, motherfucking Ho Chi Minh. As in Ho Chi Minh City. As in Tet offensive. As in Saigon. As in communist. Reading is a motherfucker. I don't know what else to say to you motherfuckers.

"Mr. Ripper from the Stuy to the Hill, it's all real/
gotta maintain 'cause the sun don't chill."
Tek of the Cocoa Brovaz a/k/a Smiff n Wesson on Still standin strong

Today I'm feeling:

whelmed, though not quite over nor under

Care to add your couple cents?

Sunday shakedown

Wow, is this what I asked for? I've got work Monday morning, which means I need to prepare a lesson plan. I've also got the world's grandest headache and a mental block bigger than the Berlin Wall. It's big enough for border security. I should sell it to Customs.

Happy Fathers' Day Larry Birkhead! You da man, however Clay Aiken-ish you are.

I might have to go on a Baskin Robbins' pistachio almond hand packed pint run in a bit, however, what with alternate side of the street parking, I'd lose my prime parking spot. The woes of a lazy, pointless, aimless, useless mofo.

Went to a streetball tournament today in Fort Greene. You know, I have to ask, where are people's brains. The guy who runs the team said they'd be short players because of Fathers' Day. First of all, Fathers' Day is really a day for people who do more than make a deposit at their local loose cervix. Not to say that everyone on this team is a remote pops. But c'mon, enough of them, I'm sure could come out to play some streetball. So, off the bat, you've got to question the resolve of this team. Anyways, so we start to scoop up people in the park to fill out the roster for the day so we could at least get the run in and... NO! Forfeit. Because the jerk running the team decides he'd rather pay the officials and take the loss than at least playing. I was frustrated because it must have been 100 on the black top, and the leagues seem wholly unorganized. Game time was scheduled to be 3pm, and the league director doesn't show up until 3. Then the guy fixing the net takes 30 minutes to put up two nets. Ridiculous. Peoples' brain are vacating this early in the summer. It sure doesn't look good.

"...bitch, know my forte, I'm not for play/
get your block, let the Gloch 4 play/
finger fucking the trigger, it's not foreplay/
one more time, I'm not for play..."
Beanie Sigel on Man's World

Today I'm feeling:

Like a boy amongst infants

No, no my head is throbbing. Ouch!

Shading my face from the glare

Su and the pigeons

Exhausted of late. Maybe I'm vitamin deficient?

Let me be the first to say it! Free Paris.

I should've printed t-shirts and hustled them on the avenue.

Big things a gwon. Tomorrow there's Museum Mile. I'm definitely doing that shit. Then Wednesday, there's this thing in 'Billyburg where you go, get free screening tickets to Eagle v. Shark and get to Hula Hoop! And there was something else in the fray for Thursday too, though I forget what exactly. And my Monday substitute gig was extended from an afternoon only affair to a whole day thing. Neat, no?

Anyone else anticipating SiCKO?

"Son said 'Hov, how you get so fly?'/
I said 'from not being afraid to fall out the sky!'"
Jay-Z on Beach Chair

Today I'm feeling:

like life is anything but a beach chair

Life is but a bad dream.

Parkin' it

Serenity at Washington Sq. Park, NYC

"...I switched my motto, 'stead of saying 'fuck tomorrow'/
that buck that bought a bottle coulda struck the Lotto..."
Nas on Life's a Bitch

"Drawing something is drawing light"
Sukyung Heo, May 2007

Here's Sukyung's (Tiramisu's) philosophy:
There is light in everything. Even the shadows are a result of light. Light is everything. When you draw, you are drawing the light. Every color, everything.

Well put my friend. May your English continue to grow to limitless mastery.

No bar-B-ques, no beach, no anything. But why should I get all up in this Memorial Day action? I don't work. Most use this day as a welcome respite during the season's first really mild weather. But, my whole life is the weekend. And like I give a fuck about soldiers supposedly fighting for some phantom freedom I have in a land far, far away. So, in a matter-of-fact, just another day sort of way, I ain't doing shit.

Today I'm feeling:

lacking in grace

...and substance. Tell me 'bout your days y'all!

Fail to plan to fail

It's Natalie!!! I hope she doesn't mind.

Yes, I'm going to vote for him. Even if I have to write him in. I don't agree with everything Ron Paul is for (most notably his pro life stance and his border security issues) but he's certainly the most competent in most regards of American life. I'm no republican either, but a good leader is a good leader and the fact of the matter is that I'm no democrat either.

No plans in life. I'm such a loser. Here's my new take on things. I'm just going to continue to meet people and be wide eyed. Hopefully, I'll learn, see, observe, be inspired, or absorb an idea, occupation, profession or career of some sort whereby I can subsist. It's a Spartan task, I know, but there's got to be something out there I can effectively do... outside of blogging (though I'm sure I'm no Rembrandt at this either).

Today I'm feeling:

positively subordinate

Go figure.

'Caste' out the heavens

I hit a new moon bonfire yesterday. Fun thing it was. Just staring into a 10' diameter fire is almost awe inspiring. Besides the requisite 'whole state of Florida being on fire' jokes, the ambiance was pretty comradely. Maybe comradely isn't the right adjective...

So the lady who did the bonfiring brought up a pretty ubiquitous point. My writing is terribly shitty today, I can't find the right word for anything. When I say 'ubiquitous' I mean it is an understood point by nearly everyone in society. Our society. That point being that we live in a caste system. Our keeping up with the Joneses mentality is what divides us into our individual castes. Apparently, if you make 100K per annum, you've got to live in a home and drive a car that reflects that. And if you make 500K a year, you've got to have a property, and several cars to reflect that. So they've outlawed the caste system in India, but it's symbolically still in place in many regards, no? Well, it's here in this capitalist society as well.

Nah, I ain't trying to get deep or anything, nahmean? But I'm sayin' is all.

It was difficult stuff too. Some of the people in attendance were pretty loopy and you had to wonder what the fuck is wrong with these people? But it takes all types to make it a world I hear and so I decided to see if I couldn't learn anything. I'm so selfish! I learned good people surround themselves with good. I think I already knew that, but I must've relearned it. No?

Today I'm feeling:

remorse

I miss something. Yo, comment! I haven't seen shit from you so called readers in days and I've had close to a hundred hits in the past 4 days. What the fuck?

Lather, rinse, repeat

"I burn like the perm on the Mac"
Phat Kat on Nasty ain't it, also the state of Florida

What is it about paths? If you've been looking at my photography, you may have noticed I have an affinity to paths. I guess they inspire dreaming. Like, where does that path lead? And my paths never show you where they go, it's all open to interpretation. In your mind, one of "my" paths can take you anywhere you want it to. Maybe that'll be my signature. Hmmmm...

In the ghetto! This is why I love Snoop Dogg.

Okay, random thought! I want to buy a lollipop. Strawberry flavored. The Charms Blowpop in strawberry, to be exact.


And Ron Paul, a G.O.P. candidate for president. This man is my hero and the first republican in a while I'm actually a believer in. At last night's republican debate, the man essentially argued that the terrorist attacks of 9/11 were a result of U.S. policies abroad. I've been saying this shit since 9/12. Rudy, however, argued the man down to great applause from the inflamed, ignorant, American audience. But such is life for Americans... they can do no wrong (sharp biting sarcasm).

Today I'm feeling:

wingless

Maybe I need another Redbull 'cause the Coronas aren't helping.

Department of Purple

Purple couch here

Most people don't care too much for purple decor, but I thought this very long purple couch was just stunning. And cozy looking too.

Alright, still is an absolutely splendid album. I might even continue my other blog by rating this masterpiece. Lily is so good. It's absolutely music the way it was meant to be heard. The Brits are fucking coming! Amy Winehouse is almost as good. And Lady Sovereign?! Forget it!! The Brits failed with their Cockney slang, doilies and lack luster counterpart to rap (grime), but their female contemporary musicians have something. Big up!

I think Friday evening might find me at the Asia Society. Such a loser. At 27 on a Friday evening I should have some bread in my pocket trying to bag some broads at trendy clubs contracting my fair share of gonorrhea and syphilis. Instead I go to museums on their free nights and blog. It never burns when I pee. I don't have any bumps (though I don't exactly want bumps). And I don't have a long list of chicks I knocked off (or up). I gotta go now; watch me some cartoons, sharpen my crayons and color or something.

Today I'm feeling:

short in the tooth

Like I've only just got on the block instead of being around the motherfucker

I got that weed

I have no clue where to keep this thing

What the fuck is up with Amy Winehouse's voice? That bitch can blow! And the thing is, homegirl looks like a pack-a-day smoker, where does she get the lungs?

Made my first run of the season to Dairy Queen last night. It was full of fatties in line. How cute, I thought. How cute.

Today seems ripe for the Whitney. I've been promising myself the trip for a while. It's finally going to happen. Maybe I can convince mother to roll.

Overheard at Dairy Queen:
Man 1: Your baby looks like a dog.
Mother of "baby": Ahahahah!

Today I'm feeling:

lethargic

I don't suppose I'm eating right. What's up?

Lost in left

Gas price tip: fill up when it's cool (i.e. 3am in the morning), that's when gas is denser and you'll get the biggest bang for your buck!

I saw René Magritte's bowler hat at the 23rd Street R train station in the Flatiron District and am promising a pic.

"Never pray for patience, because God will try it."
Starbucks' employee's mother

Fun stuff! I found a third basketball team. I'm on 4 organized sports teams. I've played 4 basketball games and 1 softball game in the past 7 days and my body is holding up.

And out of left field (speaking of sports, right) I was rung by the quasi Buddhist last night/this morning. I was cordial. But I'm still a bastard. I got to be. Until someone gives me good reason to be otherwise.

Oh, and this jobless thing... I couldn't be busier. My tutee referred me to a new tutee, however, now it's just a matter of the other shoe dropping as assuredly she's only passing me off as she probably knows she no longer needs me.

"Dasawl"
My mother saying 'that's all' as if to sarcastically say "why shouldn't he/she/it?"

And I don't like looking in the mirror because I always see the same motherfucker looking right back at me.

Today I'm feeling:

up to my eyeballs in light frustration

Like the British make time for light refreshments, my life seems to always invite light frustrations. Care to agree or disagree?

Dae han min gook!

Inside the Solomon R.

Guess who's tutoring a new Korean today? I guess I'm not only big in Japan, I must be big in the big rabbit too.

Good feelings! Physically, I played three basketball games since Thursday and a year ago I would have been too sore right about now. Today I could play another three back to back to back. It feels good to be in decent shape.

Bad feelings! Emotionally, something's missing.

Yet another striking contrast.

And what's going on in Northern Ireland? Is that peace? I've known, for some time now, that the Irish were world class bomb makers. Will they now be freelance bomb makers or will they just give the trade up? Peace is such a distraction!

Simple pleasure of the day: home ground Caffé Verona decaf coffee, brewed in my french press. Delicious.

Today I'm feeling:

like I could go for some acupuncture

And today, I can't put my finger on it, but there's something about today.

A Caveman could do it!

Buenos Aires, April, 2006

The Blow are playing in New York in May. They actually play for free at Bard College on the 14th. Unfortunately, I have a basketball game that night.

Such is the nature of the beast.
Anonymous

I lose! I usually do. I'm just:

waiting for the other shoe to drop
Anonymous

Dangerous Wade! That boy is serious. But the Baby Bulls managed to put him on the brink in the House of Shaq. What a beautiful game.

If I remember correctly, the cabs in that picture run on clean natural gas. They can go from one end of the country (Argentina) to the other on about US$30 worth of fuel. Their engines don't have as much power, but they run farther on far less.

I can clean my Mazda! It'll probably be what I do today if I don't get around to hitting the Cloisters. In December I gave out my Dirt Devil for repair and refused to pay the 75¢ to use the vacuums at the car wash/gas station. 5 Months later, the repair place calls me and when I get there they hand me a brand new one. Does this advocate the slow and deep? Slow and deep. Hmmm?

Today I'm feeling:

like life is my holding cell and Samuel Adams is my bail bondsman

In reality, you should all let ambition be your bail bondsman. Speak on it.

The "tingle"

It took about two days for my rabbit grave to explode with life. Check out my soon to be red azalea and my rich, purple, and young rhododendron.

On the subject of driving: ladies and gentlemen, I drive a Mazda (pronounced Meh-zzduh) and it's obvious my driving is not for the faint of heart. But I'm one with my Mazda and we take curves like bitches' good reputations. I say this all because I met my quasi Buddhist friend last night. She was a little un-Buddhist-esque about my maneuvering. But, my Mazda driving is pure Zen and I just needed to get that off my chest.

I'm currently listening to: Drive Slow (remix) by T.I. featuring Kanye West, Paul Wall and some other cat whose name I'll never remember, especially not at a quarter to 3 in the am.

And oh yeah, the "tingle" thing. Inside joke. Both literally and figuratively.

Today I'm feeling:

the warm fuzziness of a graceful presence

Thanks lil homie. Now comment, y'all.

Ruminating on a Sunday

It'd be perfect if, no matter where I am, Brooklyn was always 2-4 minutes away!

Today I'm feeling:

lots

and it's all tickling my fancy for the moment

Engrish

Asian footwear. Made by Asians and, ironically, worn by Asians.

The amazing weather has returned!!!

I didn't do a museum or any of that shit, but I did... nothing. It was good. Also, I planted up my rabbit grave! I put a red azalea and a purple rhodendra up in that bitch.

Shit's functioning.

Avec moi, bitches!

My apologies for the gratuitous profanity today.

Today I'm feeling:

the need for decaf

What up?!?!?

4/20

Goshen, New York

There you go! I found a grassy knoll for your admiration. I hope yours was a holiday filled with much intoxication...

Nothing beats psychedelics.

Today I'm feeling:

dry

So... did'ya go overboard on the greenery?